Tags: caregivers, anxiety, fear, isolation, loneliness, consoling, confusion, video chats, dementia, Alzheimer’s, teaching
Since we celebrated Lynne going off hospice after gaining weight, our major focus is helping her in the various moods she experiences. Lynne signals us to meet her in her moods until she is more comfortable with us. It’s my guess she is more and more comfortable with quiet familiar friends. She reacts to sudden noises and voices. Pam and I took her to a favorite spot in a hair salon, but she became so uncomfortable we all decided she is no longer comfortable with washing, drying, and flat ironing her hair.
Lynne walking to get space from friends
She was happy to see Susan and called her name, and equally happy to see Nancy, a regular visitor. Shortly afterward she walked alone ahead of them to keep her own space.
For a couple of weeks she is relieved to see me and reaches out to hug me with anxiety, tears, instead of excitement. I don’t want her to feel loneliness with anxiety, so I start thinking I need to more often. But that puts pressure on my writing and my personal life. I think we need to review her medications for moods. I also think we need to check for medical reasons to see why she stops so often to bend over, or grimaces from pain somewhere in her body. We cannot identify a cause.
I am full of love and appreciation for everyone from staff to friends, to family, we are doing as well as we can at this stage. I keep thinking she will find a comfortable plateau, but we need to expect change and move with her in love, even when the only way I can comfort her in my arms is, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” until she calms down.
Jim, I love the way you all learn and adjust! So difficult to find ways to connect, and alleviate pain, but you persist at it. Thankful for her faithful family and friends.